A couple of friends & I are doing a Bible Study every other Tuesday night ~ Kelly Minters No Other Gods. It's AMAZING. Like smack you upside the head amazing. Some days I don't want to turn the page because I'm still soaking in what I got the day before. (Sometimes I'll admit it's because I'm not ready to let go of something or deal with something)
My point in all of this ~ many times we think of idols as little statues that people have in their houses. Or things that are evil. But as we go through this study I'm seeing that even good things in our lives we can make into idols. The desires we have in our hearts to be loved, or accepted. The ideas that are planted in our minds about what other people say about us (or really don't say about us ~ we just think that they might possibly, maybe say it about us). I think women go through this more (and maybe I think that way because I am a woman). We let our kids, our husbands, our friends, and even our choices define us. And we spend all our time and energy persuing those things, and not persuing God.
Even today for example I caught myself with those thoughts of "What are thinking about me?" or "Oh I hope no one says anything" And then I have to stop and think ~ hey that's Satan whispering in my ear that I'm not a good mother for leaving (or if we had stayed). That I didn't pick up on something before we left the house. What kind of mother am I anyway??? You know the drill...the next thing you know you've labeled yourself as an awful person that isn't fit to sit in mud. (Surely I can not be the only one who goes thru this!!!) Not that I shouldn't be aware of the desire to be a good mom to my kids ~ I should want to be! But it's all in my priorities. I should desire to be a good mom to my kids because God would want that ~ not because the other mom's at story hour at school will talk about me.
My other 'revelation' if you will in the study has been my desire for Godly friends. Not that I have no friends, (I do) but friends to go out with, and just connect with. I realized this week that I was about to shortchange myself in this area. In the story of Rachel & Leah, Leah traded her sons mandrakes for a night with Jacob. She ran out to the field to tell him that she got to go to bed with him that night. She was willing to do anything and travel a great distance for that 'feeling' of love. Not true love, but that feeling. UGH. I was headed there. Not that I traded anything for a night with my husband!!! But for an evening with some girls. What my desire is and what I was settling for are two very different things. Idols!
So I ask you this ~ what in your life is controlling you? What is a good thing in your life and your making it an ultimate thing? Is it God? Is it something else?